Toys for Tots

I donated a toy today in memory of you. I wish that you could recieve it but that was not meant to be. I miss you every day. Your brother Griffin has been lighting a candle for you alot lately. I wish that he could have spent more time with you. I know that your spirit will be here with us this Christmas and we have a special ornament on the tree for you.

Love, mom.

Tristin,

We lit a candle for you Sunday night. I miss you. I don't know how I got so lucky to have had you in my life, even if it was short. We have memories of you everywhere in our house. I go to bed remembering how it felt to touch your skin, kiss your cheeks, and every part of you that I could. You have been gone from us for about 7 months now and I still can't believe that you are gone. You have changed our lives forever. I sometimes wonder if you can watch us and see what is going on here on earth. I dreamt of you one night in the form of a hummingbird flying around my living room. I just wanted to keep you with me forever. I miss your many expressions, and how you would just look at me with such intensity and love.

Mommy loves you, and misses you!

Dear Tristin,

I miss you more than words can say. I thank God for having the chance to hold you and love you while you were here for such a short time. I can remember looking into your eyes and seeing how much you loved me. I have been so lucky in my life to have given birth to two of the most amazing children to have ever graced this earth. I know that you, your grandpa, and your aunt Lisa are watching over us and I know that you are not hurting anymore. I hope God graces us with another child one day and I can see the love that was in your eyes. At just 2 months old you already displayed such a charismatic personality. I love you and miss you with all my heart.

love, mommy.

Hi, I'm Mandy Fairbanks and this blog is in honor of our dear son Tristin Riley Fairbanks. He had a heart defect called hypoplastic left heart syndrome. He was a true fighter till the end. I decided to start this blog so that I can share my feelings and my experience with others. I've heard that writing is a good source to help you in your grieving process. I've had a tough year so far. Our son Tristin died on the 20th of May and then my father died just a few weeks ago, October 18th. He died almost 5 months to the day that we lost our son Tristin.

I hope in reading this it will possibly help other parents with children with hypoplastic left heart syndrome, and also help me work through some of my grief. Thank you for reading.